Life in a larger-than-normal family can be hard. The work, is constant; the disputes, often frequent; the noise level, well- as one visitor put it "I don't think I've ever been at a meal this loud!" Yikes; and I hardly ever get to drink my coffee before it turns cold.
Connor and Joe had an argument at the dinner table tonight. A loud, harsh, "say things you don't mean" kind of argument. My heart sunk. My appetite fled. Dinner was spoiled. I was torn between the man I love and the boy I bore. My flesh and blood, and my highschool sweetheart.. Connor- my independent and sometimes misunderstood wildchild, and Joe- my hardworking, God-fearing, tired (tonight) husband. I hate moments like that. I'm thankful they don't happen too often around here, but tonight they did. I felt the need as a faithful wife to remain silent, and pray God would work in both their hearts to heal the damage from the words that had been said.
The Bible lay on the table waiting to be picked up by Joe for family devotions. It wasn't going to happen tonight. So I picked it up and started reading. I'm not sure anyone genuinely listened to what was being said.
After I was done, everyone left the table and went their separate ways. Bitter. Silent. I looked around at the large mess that cooking dinner for a large family tends to make. I sighed, and did the dishes with a hard heart. After the kitchen was cleaned up, I scooped up little Charlotte and took her upstairs to put her to bed. As I sat down in the rocking chair to nurse her, I looked out her window which overlooks the backyard. There, was Joe. Playing wiffleball with his children. Laughing- all of them.
Thank you Lord, for the spirit of forgiveness and renewed love for one another. And thank you for my loud, large, lovely family.
I think I'll go bake some brownies for my baseball team.
Life in a large family can be hard. But, Oh. The. JOY.
Happy First Day of Spring :)
You're gonna write a book someday aren't you?
ReplyDeleteBeautiful Elizabeth! God honored your self-discipline and prayers. I just love your blog. Thank you for your encouragement and transparency.
ReplyDeleteLisa Hill
you are so right...OH THE JOY!
ReplyDeleteI just love your writing style (like your Mom's!) and I appreciate your transparent and encouraging thoughts on your day. The way you held your tongue and prayed was a good example to all of us wives and mothers. Not easy! But worth striving for. And Joe gets an "attaboy!" for picking up that wiffleball, despite his own tiredness, to connect with his kids in the fun and lighthearted way that was so needed at the time. I'm sure your brownies were delish... :o)
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